Are you having the best sex ever? Or do you think you and your man have gotten into a stale routine? Perhaps you want to surprise a new lover by being the best he’s ever had. If you think this is an impossible goal, you’re wrong! Not only can you blow his mind, but you might be surprised at how good sex can be for you. And that’s definitely something more women should be exploring!
While there’s no single secret to having sex that he’ll never forget or being the best partner he’ll ever have, we do have some advice on how to have the best sex ever with him. Combine a loving relationship with advice from below to have a smoldering sex life. Hopefully, your man will return the favor as much as possible, and you will both mutually benefit from amazing sex!
1. BE COMFORTABLE WITH ONE ANOTHER
If you’re not comfortable with the guy you’re having sex with, how do you expect to have the best sex ever? Being uncomfortable may mean that you don’t speak up when you don’t like something, that you don’t tell him about kinks that turn you on or that you don’t ask for oral sex, even if it’s the only way for you to orgasm! The more comfortable you are with a guy, the more you can explore your sexuality together!
2. BE COMFORTABLE WITH YOURSELF
Not only should you be comfortable with whom you’re stripping down with, you need to feel comfortable with yourself. If you’re worried about your inexperience or have body issues, like almost everyone, then sex might not be very good. In fact, worrying about when and whether you’ll cum or if you’ll be the best sex he’s ever had might be the very thing that makes it lackluster.
Guys love confidence. Everyone does, really. But aside from that, being able to forget your worries and enjoy yourself ensures both of you get everything you possibly can out of sex. If you’re worried about every little thing, whether they’re legitimate concerns or not, you might benefit from reading this post about dealing with sexual anxiety.
It may also help to invest in some lingerie that makes you feel sexy. More on that here.
3. BUILD IT UP
Jumping right into the sack is great, but you might be surprised how much buildup can lead to the best sex ever. Start early on by announcing your plans to have sex or just subtly insinuating them. Perhaps whisper it into his ear as one of you leaves, send a sexy picture of your underwear when you’re at work or send him a raunchy email during the day.
But don’t just head right to the main event when you have time, even though it’s tempting. Instead, spend time with your bodies close together. A sensual massage – more on that here – is great for this. It can also help to melt away stress and get you in the right mood.
Don’t forget about foreplay, either. I hope you’ll agree that it’s pretty essential for most women to achieve orgasm, and it will bring you to the edge much easier – and perhaps with more intensity. In fact, edging is the term that refers to bringing yourself near to orgasm and backing off, and it often results in incredibly powerful orgasms.
Of course, you want to focus on your man, too. Spend some time making out before heading for the belt. Make sure you read our tips about giving head for more tips. Surprise him with a lubed-up hand job. Don’t forget about his balls and other erogenous zones, either. He’ll thank you for it – if he can even speak, that is!
4. TALK DIRTY WITH HIM
Talking dirty serves a couple of purposes. First, it’s hot. Who doesn’t like to hear encouraging feedback about how they’re doing? It can help us to get off and do the same for our partners. Furthermore, it’s sexy to hear your name moaned from your partner’s lips.
But dirty talk also serves as a way to describe what you want and need in bed – and what you don’t want and need, which can help you have some of the best sex ever. Talking dirty can seem awkward at first, especially if you’re more on the quiet side, but we’ve got this guide to help you out. Start with describing how good something feels, what you like or what you want to do to your man, and continue along that path as long as it seems like he’s into it.
5. EXPLORE YOUR FANTASIES
To blow his mind, you’ll probably want to do something more than a quickie in the missionary position while the kids are watching TV in the other room. No, you’ll want to really explore your fantasies. This means you’ll need to talk about them first. Not only is this a great way to learn more about your partner and become closer, but it can be hot, too (see above)!
Once you know what his fantasies are, you can consider how to make them come true. Not every fantasy may be something that you can or want to achieve, but you can discuss those fantasies to help your man enjoy them. You can also try out things such as bondage and discipline – try spanking – submission/domination, role playing and using toys together to enhance your time in the bedroom together.
Plus, you should discuss what it is that you’d like to try. Men often love when women take the wheel in the bedroom, and this is one way to do so. If your sex life has thus far been pretty vanilla, then it might not take much to spice things up in the bedroom, and we’ve got an entire selection of articles dedicated to keeping your sex life fun!
6. TRY NEW POSITIONS
If you only default to the same position or two when you’ve having sex, it’s probably not the best sex you could be having. Different positions introduce an entirely new range of sensations. For example, doggy style is good for stimulating the G-spot, while you might prefer being on top because you can control depth and angle of penetration.
Our list of sex positions is nearly a mile long, and includes many positions that will get you outside the bedroom or, at least, off the bed! Speaking of which…
7. HAVE SEX IN NEW LOCATIONS
Whether you move to the couch, the kitchen table, the laundry room or the car, you’ll certainly give him something to remember by simply having sex someplace different. You might want to try sex outside. Read our advice to make it hot and avoid getting in trouble. Perhaps the two of you can rent a hotel room for a night or weekend for mind-blowing sex. Have sex on a blanket under the stars or while camping.
Sure, these places might not be the most romantic and you risk getting caught in some locales, but that’s also the appeal of having sex whenever and wherever you can!
8. GET LUBRICATED
We’re talking about both the literal and social sense of the word. Don’t be afraid to use lube, which makes things more slippery and comfortable for longer periods of time. Read more about lube here.
Secondly, consider a little social lubricant, especially if it helps you relax. There’s no need to get obliterated, but some couples report having the best sex ever after a glass or two of wine, as it helps to shed the stresses of the day and helps you bring out your sexy side.
9. DON’T BE AFRAID TO PLAN
There’s nothing wrong with spontaneous sex, and some of the best sex ever wasn’t planned. However, some people think that sex should always be spontaneous, and that can actually lead to more awkward or even less frequent sex than you’d like! If you plan, you can set up the atmosphere with candles or music, dress sexy for your man and have toys at the ready.
Chances are, planning the sex you’ll have will turn you on quite a bit, which is always a good thing when you’re a bad girl! If your man knows what you’ve got planned, then he might be thinking about it all day. Consider sending some naughty texts back and forth while one or both of you is at work, or you could snap a shot of your accessories to have him prepared for what’s to come.
Of course, surprising your man might also lead to some of the best sex he’s ever had, especially if he’s usually the one to initiate or the two of you haven’t been intimate in some time.
You don’t need to make a big to-do out of sex every time, but planning it every once and a while ensures you’re not just going through the motions.
10. ENJOY YOUR OWN ORGASM
Finally, you should enjoy sex and your orgasm. There are few things men like more than knowing they’ve pleased a woman in bed. A powerful orgasm is definitely something that will send him over the edge. Learn how to make yourself cum through masturbation, then show him what does it for you.
There’s no need to fake it, either. Sex is about the journey, and you shouldn’t feel pressure to orgasm. Make sure he knows how much you enjoy and appreciate your time together. After all, sex is about both of you, and what sets one romp apart from the rest is often simply knowing how turned on your partner is!