When you’re into a guy, you want to know that he feels the same way. You might feel frustrated by constantly trying to decode signals, seeing if he reacts differently to you than he does to other attractive girls, and trying to keep an eye out for subtle changes in his mood to figure out whether he’s feeling your vibes.
It can be tough to tell whether a guy is sexually attracted to you, but fear not—we’ve got your back. If you’re wondering how to tell if a guy is horny for you, check out our list of signs a guy is getting turned on. Let’s get started.
The More Signs, The Better
Let’s be clear: there’s no one definitive way to tell that a guy is getting turned on by your presence. The more signs you turn him on, you notice, the more likely it is that your minds are in the same place. Try to focus on the vibes as much as the physical signs a guy is turned on—sexual tension is real, and when there’s a hot connection, both of you will be able to feel it.
If sexual tension between you and a guy is growing, you’ll probably notice more and more of these signs over time. Keep an eye out for consistency—does he exhibit signs of being turned on by you most days, or is it just a one-time thing? Guys are human, and like us, they get horny. To know that he’s physically attracted to you (and not just having a hormonal moment), be sure to take note of whether he’s showing that he’s turned on by you regularly over time.
Read: How to Make A Guy Horny
Men Are Not All The Same
The key to figuring out whether a guy is turned on? Get to know him. It can be tough to talk to a hot guy, especially when you’re hoping he feels the same way about you that you do about him. Suck it up and learn more about him. You don’t need to let everyone around you in on the fact that you think a guy is hot, but try to chat up people close to him to get more information. The more you know about his personality, the easier it will be to tell whether he’s showing signs that he’s down to hook up.
Related: How to Smoothly Hook Up with a Guy
The more you pay attention to what gets the guy you’re interested in going, the more you’ll be able to pick up on the signs that you’re feeling the same sexual tension. Remember, you don’t want to be too obvious when watching him. Lots of guys love the chase (it’s why some women play hard to get), and if they know that you’re feeling turned on by them, they might feel like they don’t need to try quite as hard to get you on the same page. Play it cool and let him start to wonder whether you’re as turned on by him as he is by you.
Watch what puts a spark in his eye, and see if you can pick up on any patterns. The more you know about how the guy you want to get into the bedroom acts outside of the bedroom, the better you’ll be able to tell if you’re pushing the right buttons to get him excited.
Be careful that you don’t base your thoughts on whether a guy is turned based on your experience with other guys. While past experiences may provide information relevant to current experiences, what you experienced with your ex or last hookup may not apply to your new dude. Take your time, get to know him, and pay attention to precisely what makes him tick.
Here, we’ll take a look at signs that usually mean a guy is picking up on the sexual vibes you’re putting down.
1. He explicitly tells you.
When a guy tells you that he’s turned on by you, believe him. He isn’t trying to flatter you or boost your ego. If a guy tells you that he wants you, it means he’s ready to get hot and heavy. Of course, not all guys will say “I’m turned on by what you’re doing.”
Keep an ear out for phrases like:
- You’re making me so hot right now.
- I have to have you.
- You’re making it hard for me to concentrate—don’t stop.
- Keep doing what you’re doing (also a surefire sign he likes sex with you).
- You’re so sexy.
If you want to know whether a guy is sexually attracted to you, don’t be afraid to throw out some of these phrases and see if he reciprocates. A lot of guys love compliments.
Don’t get discouraged if you aren’t hearing these phrases from the guy you’re into yet. For many guys, flat-out telling you they’re down to hook up comes after many other signs that you turn them on. While this one is the end-all-be-all to knowing whether he’s turned on by you, there are plenty of other signs to look for while trying to figure out if you guys could be a good fit behind closed doors.
2. He is erect.
There’s no way around it—if a guy is getting hard for you, more than likely, he’s feeling your sexy vibes. If you’re making out with a guy and you start to feel him getting hard, you know you’re steering things in the right direction.
If you don’t notice that he’s getting erect, however, don’t worry. Many factors can interfere with a guy’s ability to get hard, including needing to pee, being stressed out, or having too much to drink.
If you notice that a guy is starting to get hard while you’re hooking up, keep doing what you’re doing. If you feel comfortable, let him know that you can feel how turned on he is, and tell him how turned on it makes you in return. Guys love knowing that they’re reading your signals correctly, and letting him know that you love what you’re doing to him will help him feel comfortable and excited as you continue toward the finish line.
3. He is breathing faster than normal.
When a guy is feeling sexually attracted to you, you’ll notice that he starts breathing faster and heavier. If he’s suddenly sighing, taking deep breaths for no reason, or sounds like he just went for a run even though he’s sitting still, there’s a good chance that something is getting his hormones pumping.
Pay attention to whether his breathing increases when you step closer to him. If sexual attraction is causing the increase in his breathing rate, it’ll likely pick up even more when you approach him. Don’t be too obvious about it—just try to listen to see if the pace of his breath seems to quicken as you get close.
If you’re actually in the process of hooking up, you can also figure out if you’re turning him on by paying attention to how fast he’s breathing. An uptick in his breathing is a sure sign that his heart is beating faster and his hormones are rushing.
4. He is making a lot of physical contact with you.
If a guy is making unnecessary physical contact with you, there’s a good chance that he wants to get close to you behind closed doors as well. If a guy is reaching to you out of necessity (to shake your hand or to steady himself after tripping), try not to read too much into it.
Pay attention to whether he touches you when he doesn’t have to, like tapping your arm when he wants to tell you something instead of just saying your name. Take note of whether this behavior is specific to you or if he’s like this with everyone. Some guys are naturally touchy, while others only touch when they feel attraction.
5. He’s looking deeply into your eyes.
Eye contact is crazy intimate, and if a guy is taking the time to stare into your eyes, it’s likely that he’s super turned on. Brief eye contact is a normal part of conversation, but if you notice that he catches your gaze even when he’s not talking to you, there’s a good chance that he’s just as turned on as you are.
Just like with feeling him get hard and noticing a change in his breathing patterns, eye contact while you’re making out or getting busy can also be a sign that he’s crazy turned on by what you’re doing. Try to hold his gaze while you’re hooking up—it’ll make him even hotter.
6. He’s flirting with you more than normal.
Has the object of your affection ramped up his flirting efforts recently? If so, there’s a good chance that he’s feeling a new level of attraction. If you notice that he’s calling, texting, and stopping to chat with you more often, you’ve likely sparked something that’s making him want to spend more time with you.
Remember, flirting tends to ebb and flow, and laying it on thick then backing off for a bit can be part of the game. Pay attention to how much he flirts with you, but be sure to stay on the lookout for other signs too.
7. His flirting is getting dirty—in a good way.
If the guy you’re interested in suddenly starts dropping innuendos or asking dirty questions when he hasn’t before, he’s letting you know that he’s thinking about you in a sexual way. Watch for this as a change in his personality. Some guys do this kind of thing all the time, while others reserve that kind of talk for people who turn them on.
If you’re into it, feel free to toss your own innuendos right back at him—he’ll love the playful shift in your personality as much as you love the newfound sexual attention you’re getting from him.
8. He checks you out when you’re not talking to each other.
Do you notice that he’s staring at you from across the room, even when you’re not involved in conversation? When a man is sexually attracted to you, he won’t be able to keep his eyes off of you, no matter what else is going on. Pay attention and see if he keeps sneaking glances. Try dressing sexy to encourage his checking you out.
He might also go out of his way to walk by you, even when he doesn’t have anything to say. If he’s putting himself in your physical space unnecessarily, it’s because he wants to be there.
9. You can cut the sexual tension with a knife.
You know sexual tension when you feel it—a surge of energy in one another’s presence. If your heart is racing and your breathing picks up when you encounter each other, pay attention to see if he’s feeling it too.
Read More: Why Sexual Tension is the Most Important and Powerful Sex Move
Sexual tension can make you both trip over your words, blush, and feel shaky when you’re around each other. When the sexual tension is high, you won’t be able to stop looking at one another, and it’ll be tough to stop smiling.
10. He’s nervous around you.
Some people are nervous by nature, but if you notice that a guy is suddenly struggling to keep himself together when he’s around you, there’s a good chance he’s feeling turned on. You might notice that he stutters, makes silly mistakes, or fidgets when he sees you.
If a guy seems nervous when talking to you, there’s a good chance he’s feeling the sexual energy. Pay attention to his eye contact. If he keeps looking at you and then nervously looking away when he notices you’re looking back, it’s a sure sign that he’s feeling the same vibes you are.
Is nervousness a sign that he’s shy? Look for these signs a shy guy likes you.
11. He starts blushing.
If you’re feeling turned on by someone, your heart rate picks up. Your blood starts flowing faster, and it’s likely that you feel your face flush. The same is true for guys. When a guy is feeling turned on by you, his body reacts the same way.
Flushing and hard nipples are two common signs of arousal.
As blood rushes to—ahem—other areas of his body, his face will get flushed as well. If you’re down to make the same innuendos you’ve been hearing from him, pay attention to what happens to his cheeks when you reference sex. If you see that he’s turning red, there’s a good chance he’s feeling the same way you are.
12. He flubs his words around you.
We’ve all been there—nervous, anxious, and trying to impress someone we find attractive. When a guy is into you sexually, it can be tough for him to put words together. He might even notice it himself and try to make a joke about it—or he might get embarrassed and try to brush it off.
Follow his lead on how he reacts to getting tongue-tied, and don’t embarrass him if he seems to be feeling anxious and unsure of himself. Keep the conversation going, and take it as a compliment that you have him so turned on that he’s having trouble forming complete sentences.
13. You can just feel it.
This is one of the most common signs that a guy is turned on, but it’s tough to pin down. You know it when you feel it, but putting it into words can feel difficult. When a person you’re into is turned on by you, you likely feel excited, positive, and sexy when you’re around each other. You can just feel it when another person is into you, even if they aren’t quite ready to say it yet. When someone is turned on by you, you’ll have no question that they’re down to hook up.
It’s likely that the people around you will be able to feel it, too—don’t be surprised if a friend mentions that they were able to feel the heat. His friends will likely say it to him, as it’s easy to see when someone you’re close to is experiencing a sexual spark.
14. He tells you something nice.
We’re not talking about complimenting your presentation at work or congratulating you on handling a tough situation with a friend. But, if the guy you’re interested in starts taking a closer look at your appearance, complimenting how hot you are, or mentions the sexy way you walk, there’s no doubt about it—he’s into you and is majorly turned on.
This works well if you’ve got a praise kink.
Men know that they’re risking rejection when they speak up to a woman about something that turns them on, and letting you know what they like about you means they’re taking a chance. When a guy compliments you, don’t put him down by rejecting the compliment. Graciously thank him, and if you’re feeling it, pay a similar compliment in return.
Related: 16 signs a guy likes you.
15. He’s physically closer to you than normal during the conversation.
Just keeping it real—if a guy crams in next to you in an elevator or a crowded subway car, it doesn’t necessarily mean that he’s turned on. If he gets close to you when he doesn’t have to, however, there’s a good chance he’s feeling sexy vibes.
Pay attention to his feet as well. When people are standing in a group, they tend to point their feet toward the person they’re most interested in. If the guy you’re feeling is standing with his feet pointed toward you, it’s likely that he’s feeling turned on and wants to get closer to you.
Learn: How to read and understand body language.
16. He tries to stay close to you when you’re not talking.
When you’re hanging out in a group, it’s normal for someone to move closer to you so that you can more easily hear what they’re saying. Pay special attention if a guy moves close to you just because—it’s one of the most common signs a guy is turned on. If he’s coming over to talk to you about something specific, this can still be a sign that he’s feeling attracted. If he moves closer without saying anything, it’s a stronger sign that he’s feeling you.
You might also notice that he chooses to get close to you when talking isn’t required, like standing in line or taking a seat at a restaurant. It can be fun to play around with this a bit. For example, when you walk into a place where seating arrangements aren’t pre-determined, choose a seat that requires him to make some effort to sit next to you. If he follows through and puts himself near your body, he likely finds you irresistible and has trouble staying away.
17. He bites his lip.
One of the signs a guy is turned on by you that’s easiest to notice? That sexy, sexy lip bite. You know you’ve done it too—you hear someone say something sexy, or you see a hot scene in a movie, and you find yourself instinctively biting your lip. When you do something sexy that turns a guy on, he might find it unavoidable to do the same.
Did you know that lip biting is definitely a turn-on for guys?
Guys won’t usually bite their lips just because. When he sees you doing something especially hot—like bending over or making a joke that makes it clear you think he’s hot—he might bite his lip to help him manage the intense sexual tension he’s feeling at the thought of hooking up with you.
Remember—it’s important to take stock of a guy’s behavior as a whole, and one of these signs on its own isn’t necessarily an indication that a guy is feeling turned on. Pay attention to how a guy’s behavior changes toward you over time, too. As he gets to know you and realizes how much he’s attracted to you, you’ll likely notice more and more signs that point to him feeling what you’re putting down.
Attraction can take time to build, and as long as you notice more and more of the signs mentioned here as your friendship or relationship grows, it’s likely that you’re headed in the right direction. Let the guy set the tone and follow his lead—knowing that he wanted you enough to put himself out there will make it even better when you finally hook up.