New relationships are exciting. Who doesn’t want to jump in head first? But sometimes your eagerness can lead to an imbalance in your life or even scare off your new beau. This new relationship advice will help things progress smoothly, so you’ll avoid common pitfalls.
NEW RELATIONSHIP ADVICE: MAKE SURE YOU DO THIS!
Follow this advice for a new relationship if you want to make it work.
1. Set boundaries. How often do you speak and get together? How can he talk to you? Are there any friends he might spend a bit too much time with? Does he need to prioritize you and your relationship over other people and situations in his life? Set those boundaries early!
2. Negotiate with him. Boundaries should negotiable. Don’t just make demands. Figure out what both of you need and how you can give it to each other. Don’t be stubborn if there’s room for cooperation.
3. Show affection. Hug, kiss and hold hands. You’re in a relationship now! If either of you is uncomfortable with public displays of affection, discuss when you’ll be affectionate and how.
4. Take things slow. Get to know one another. Provide enough time for emotional connection and not just physical connection. Provide time for both of you to adjust your schedules.
5. Communicate with him. Talk about your needs and your feelings. Don’t forget to talk about sex, too. These conversations are difficult, but they’re important. If you avoid difficult issues, you’ll wind up growing resentful and even having huge fights where your bottled-up emotions burst out.
6. Explain insecurities. Did your ex cheat on you? Are you worried because your new man is so good looking? Did your parents divorce early? These are all things that can lead to insecurities, and explaining them rather than being clingy or unstable is the most productive option.
7. Believe him. If he says he loves you, that you’re gorgeous or otherwise gives you a compliment, believe him. This might sound like a simple piece of new relationship advice, but it will help during the entire length of your relationship if you can smile and say “Thank you” when you receive a compliment. Don’t forget to give him compliments, too. Men love that!
8. Allow yourself to be happy. You’re dating someone new. Don’t get caught up about how it’s doomed to end badly, especially if it’s going well. You deserve happiness, so let yourself have it! If you can’t, it might be due to a fear of commitment. Learn more about that.
9. Spend time together. And spend it doing things other than having sex. Don’t get us wrong; sex is important, but you need to go out on dates, play games, make each other laugh and have fun in non-sexual ways, too.
10. Accept his quirks. If he spends the night or you go to his place, you’ll learn the way he does things. Everyone has their own little quirks, and it might take a bit to get used to his. But is it really a deal-breaker if he mixes all his food together when he eats? You might need to think big-picture to get over some issues, but every relationship takes adjustment.
ADVICE FOR A NEW RELATIONSHIP: WHAT NOT TO DO
Now that you’ve read new relationship advice about what you should do keep reading to learn what you shouldn’t do.
11. Don’t forget about your friends and family. It’s normal to adjust your schedule as you make room for a new person, one with whom you’re enthralled. But don’t become a stranger to those who love you dearly. If your relationship does end, which is always possible, you’ll find yourself without a support network. But even more that, ignoring your friends and family is just plain rude, even if it’s all too easy to do at the beginning of a relationship!
12. Don’t jump into a relationship as a rebound. Take time to re-find yourself and connect with people who might have fallen to the wayside in your previous relationship. Examine what you did wrong and how to prevent that from happening again. Don’t just settle for the first person you happen across because you’re afraid of being alone or sad. And if you do happen to meet someone quickly, don’t pretend that relationship is at the same stage as you were with your ex because it’s not.
13. Don’t rush into saying “I love you.” Rebound or not, don’t utter those three special words if you don’t actually mean them. Don’t try to convince yourself that it’s true or say it just because you want him to. When should you say “I love you”? Check out this post.
14. Don’t plan your future. It’s a new relationship. You’ve still got a lot to discover about one another. Only time will tell if your relationship will lead to marriage, children or a shared home. So stop practicing your married signature and just enjoy the butterflies you’ve got now.
15. Don’t rush into sex. If you want to have sex on the first date because you actually want sex, that’s great. But you shouldn’t feel pressured or like you have to. It won’t make him like you more, and one study suggests that waiting a month before you have sex makes for a better relationship.
16. Don’t compare him to your ex. This means you shouldn’t point out how your ex was sooo much better at cooking. Nor should you think that your new man will make the same mistakes that your ex made. While we’re on the thought, don’t compare yourself to his ex. We’ve all got a past, and you’ll need to get over that when you’re in a new relationship. She may have been his first or better at something than you are, but if he’s with you now, there’s a reason for that!
17. Don’t pretend to like something just because he’s into it. Yes, it can be attractive when women like sports, video games or something else typically associated with masculinity, but guys also appreciate when you’re into girly stuff that they don’t understand. At the very least, pretending is dishonest, and it’ll only become harder to keep a lie in check as your relationship progresses.
18. Don’t do everything he asks. Piggybacking on the previous idea, we have this point. You might want to please your new man, but you shouldn’t drop everything just for him. You’re your own person, too. Plus, if he’s demanding, it might be a sign of emotional abuse, and you might need to reconsider this relationship before you get in deeper.
19.Don’t focus on labels. Enjoy the fun you have and the time you spend together without getting too caught up on where you stand. Your relationship isn’t a status symbol. If you know people who are all about becoming “Facebook official” just to boost their ego, then you understand this piece of new relationship advice.
20. Don’t be clingy. If you have a hard time being alone, are wondering where you stand or know that other women want your man, you might start feeling jealousy and being clingy. Everyone gets jealous from time to time. But it’s a turn off when you do clingy things.
21. Don’t introduce him too soon. If you’re only sleeping together, it’s probably not the right time to introduce him to your family. The same goes for introducing him to your friends too soon too. And when you do, don’t do it all at once. Introduce him slowly, so he’ll have time to get used to everyone.
Now, no one of these twenty-one new relationship tips is necessarily the most important tip, but you should keep it all in mind to make sure you find balance in your life and don’t jeopardize your new relationship.
Don’t stress about it, however. As you get used to having a new person in your life, you’ll learn about his quirks, and he’ll learn about yours. You might make a few missteps, or some of this advice for a new relationship might not fit your situation exactly, but you should be able to apologize and move on from them. If this new guy is really into you, he’ll understand if you make a faux pas.
Rest assured that the best new relationship advice is simply to enjoy it. See how you fit with someone else, who could become an essential part of your life.