If you believe porn, everyone is having anal sex. Those who aren’t, want to! This is especially true for guys. But why do guys like anal? What’s so good about anal sex that has them chomping at the bit for access to your back door? Fear not, we’ve got the lowdown on why men like anal so much!
WHY DO GUYS LIKE ANAL SEX, ANYWAY?
1. IT’S NEW
Any time you decide to spice things up in the bedroom, things get exciting again. Even if you or your man decides you’re not really into it, after all, talking – and thinking – about something new can make your heart beat faster and panties wetter. It’s the same with anal sex. Plus, anal ventures into new territory without being so kinky (read more about that in this post) that your man is going to feel intimidated by the prospect.
2. IT’S TIGHTER
Why do guys like anal? Because it’s tighter than vaginal sex! This is both what men like about anal sex and what makes most women hesitant to try it. He gets a tighter grip on his dick, which may make for a more intense orgasm. On the other hand, you’re being penetrated in a place that’s usually exit-only, which could potentially lead to pain.
Some women even like the challenge. Learning to accommodate larger sex toys is known as anal training.
3. IT’S TABOO
Although the anus can easily be clean enough for a rim job, it’s still viewed as a dirty and taboo place. Just because your man is an adult doesn’t mean he is immune to the appeal of something that’s forbidden, and anal is a big taboo to some people. This is especially true if he’s been raised in a more conservative manner or has only been able to have basic sex in the past.
4. YOU CAN HAVE SEX DURING SHARK WEEK
“Shark week” is just one of any slang terms that refer to the week every month when you have your period. For some people, there’s too much blood or cramps to make sex practical or sexy for that matter! It might bum one or both of your out that this activity is off the table even though period sex can be enjoyable, although it’s not for everyone.
In this case, it’s not about answering “Why do guys like anal?” Anal sex just provides another way to connect physically and emotionally while giving you great orgasms!
5. HE DOESN’T WANT TO USE A CONDOM
Vaginal sex can result in orgasms and an incredible release of hormones, but it also has at least one serious side effect: pregnancy. Using birth control and/or condoms is not only an option, but it should be a requirement in most cases! Some people will use their dislike of condoms as an excuse to have unsafe sex even though:
- Condoms are readily available.
- They’re easy to use.
- You can get them in larger and smaller sizes.
- They come in non-latex options.
Rather than have completely unsafe sex or abstain, men like anal sex because it doesn’t run the risk of pregnancy. It’s true that it’s incredibly unlikely that you will get pregnant, but anal sex isn’t without its risks, and you still might want to consider a condom, which helps prevent transmission of STIs such as HIV, which is easier to contract anally!
6. YOU’RE WORRIED ABOUT VIRGINITY
Anal sex, along with oral sex, is one type of sex that you can have while still qualifying as a virgin. Obviously, at the Bad Girls Bible, we think every consenting adult should have as much sex as they want. Go ahead and have sex on the first date if you want! Virginity is just made-up ideal that places worth on a person without merit.
But it may be difficult for you or your man to admit that and just go with the flow. So you resort to dry humping, giving your man a blowjob and, last but not least, anal sex. Consider talking about your sexual hangups so you can move past this together, though!
7. HE CAN DOUBLE PENETRATE YOU
Now, your man can easily penetrate your vagina for some amazing sex while you’re wearing a butt plug or he’s using another anal toy on you, but anal sex provides a different route to enjoy double penetration. His penis is pumping away in your ass, and your favorite toy is thrusting or vibrating in your pussy. Perhaps it’s a rabbit that provides dual stimulation, or one of you controls the toy while the other stimulates your clit. Either way, it sounds like a good time to us!
8. IT FEELS DOMINANT
Positions where your man takes you from behind work great for anal sex. There’s just something primal about his hands on your hips as he pounds away. Often, men like anal if they enjoy being dominant. And if you like to be submissive, anal sex is definitely something you should try. Of course, a dominant woman might not be into anal sex for this exact reason!
You might need to try new positions to get comfortable with anal sex during pregnancy. Find this and more advice in our post about anal sex when you’re pregnant.
BECAUSE HE’S GAY?!
Some people wonder why guys like anal if they’re straight. Doesn’t that make him gay? Nope! Just because a man wants to try anal sex with a woman doesn’t mean he’s gay. Furthermore, it doesn’t mean he’s gay if he’s into a little butt play himself. Pegging can be a turn on for both of you! His prostate (learn how to massage his prostate) is what’s so good about anal when he’s on the receiving end. It can even open up new ways for him to orgasm!
Nor does it mean it’s gay if he likes to eat ass (tips for going down on a someone’s ass).
Why do guys like anal? For any of the above reasons and maybe some we’ve forgotten to list! But not every man is really into the idea. Read on.
NOT EVERY MAN WANTS TO TRY ANAL SEX
You read that right: not every man is interested. Some try it and find it to be messy, gross or simply no better than traditional vaginal sex. Others don’t even want to try it. That’s okay, too. However, there is a stigma that every many wants to try it, so he might find himself pretending that he’s into the idea. Or if it’s your idea, you might be shocked to learn that he has no interest. Try a toy to get the job done, instead.
If you think your man shies away from the idea because he’s worried it’ll mean he’s gay, tell him the following. Anal sex with a woman is still sex with a woman. As long as he’s attracted to women, he’s straight. But it doesn’t really matter if he’s bi or has a fluid sexuality as long as everyone is a consenting adult who’s having fun!
For some men, anal sex isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be. For starters, the tightness may be uncomfortable for him or make it hard for him to last as long as he wants. Even if you’re prepared and relaxed, you might find that anal sex is just too uncomfortable to bear. Perhaps it’s because you’re man’s too well endowed (anal sex works better with some partners than others), or you have scar tissue, such as from pregnancy.
There is a host of other conditions that can make anal sex unpleasant for either of both of you and even a few that might make it dangerous. So make sure to talk to your doctor if you have any worries about the safety of anal sex.
WOMEN LIKE ANAL SEX, TOO
To understand the answer to the question “Why do guys like anal?”, you might want to consider why women like it, too! Although fewer real couples are having anal sex than porn would suggest, many have tried it. Some women especially like anal sex. It’s a different physical sensation, and some women can experience anal orgasms (discover how to orgasm from anal) or even G-spot stimulation through the wall that separates the rectum and vagina. It’s great if you’re more submissive, too!
You can experiment with sensations before having sex via anal masturbation. Advice for anal masturbation.
THE KEY TO GREAT ANAL SEX
Now that you understand what’s so good about anal, you might want to try it. Or at the very least, you want to surprise your man with something a little special in the bedroom. Here’s what you need to know and do for awesome anal sex!
- Talk about it first. Let him know if you’re excited, anxious or both. Talk about what you expect and how to deal if something goes wrong or one of you needs to stop.
- You can prepare with a douche. More advice to about preparing for anal sex in this post.
- Make sure you’re very relaxed. A sensual massage or glass of wine might help.
- Keep lube on hand. Slick, silicone-based lube works well for anal. Some people prefer a thicker gel lube. Learn more about lube.
- Start with a butt massage. Your man can work his way toward your anus and finger around it and against it (tips for anal fingering), penetrating you if you like. He can rim you (learn about rimming) to get you wet and aroused too.
- He should apply lube to your asshole and his penis before penetration.
- As he first penetrates you, you’ll want to push down with your sphincter muscles.
- Once he’s passed the sphincter, it’ll be easier for him to thrust. He should start slow and shallow, gradually working up the intensity.
- He should never penetrate you vaginally after anal sex. Doing so can introduce bacteria into your vagina that gives you an infection.
Get more advice in our guide to having anal sex.
Anal sex can certainly be fun for your man, but it can also be fun for you. Give the idea some consideration, and if you decide to go for it, liberal doses of communication, preparation and lubrication will give you the greatest chance of satisfaction.