Whether you just met, have been friends for a lifetime, or are dating casually for a few months, wondering how to tell if you’re in love can drive you crazy. If you are questioning if it is love, or maybe just lust, look for these signs to steer you in the right direction.
1. HE IS ALWAYS ON YOUR MIND
When you are at work, you’re wondering what he is doing right now. In class, you are daydreaming about the next time you’ll see him. In your car, you’re laughing about that funny thing he said last week.
If he’s always present in your thoughts, invading your mind when you should be focused on something else, it could be one way to know you’re in love. It’s not just the physical stuff, like thinking about getting him into bed later or picturing his ripped chest, either. The steamy stuff is sure to pop up, but you’ll also be thinking about conversations you’ve had, things you want to share with him and how happy you’ll be to see him.
2. YOU CAN’T WAIT TO SPEND TIME WITH HIM
The countdown clock that’s running in your head, ticking off the minutes until you see him again, may let you know you’re in love with him. You prioritize cramming time with him into your busy schedule and you wouldn’t have it any other way.
The entire time you are apart you are anticipating when you are going to see him next and you jump at the chance to meet up the second he suggests it. Sure, you have other things you have to do and commitments to meet, but what you really want to do is hang out with him.
3. HE’S THE BEST PART OF YOUR DAY
Forget that first sip of morning coffee, the cookie you had at lunch and the hilarious movie you just watched; the best part of your day is when he walks through your door.
It’s not about going on an awesome date or doing something extraordinary. He doesn’t really have to do anything to deserve the honor other than just be himself. In fact, he doesn’t even have to be present to make your day grand; just a phone call or a text is enough of a romantic gesture from him.
4. THAT FLUTTERY FEELING IN YOUR TUMMY
The butterflies in your stomach can’t keep a secret; they are one of the knowing signs you are in love. If your tummy gives a happy lurch when his gaze meets your eyes, or you see his grin or his hand brushes yours, it might be the real deal. This isn’t the excited, tingling feeling of lust. Love butterflies are usually gentler than sexual desire, though that feeling is certainly a good one to have too.
5. YOU’RE WILLING TO COMPROMISE
You like things your way, right away. But, relationships are about give and take. Still, giving up some of what you want can stink, even in a good relationship. Or, at least it does until you love him.
If it’s the real deal, you may not mind compromising so much. It’ll probably start happening unconsciously, but suddenly you’re meeting in the middle without all the drama and negativity. It may happen because you no longer feel like your needs and desires outweigh his because you are a team now. Plus, a little give may be worth it to see him happy. If you’re trying to figure out how to tell when you’re in love, this a big sign to look out for.
6. YOU ARE HAPPY DOING NOTHING, AS LONG AS IT’S TOGETHER
Before love, dating was all about… well, the date. Now you no longer need elaborate plans, exquisite restaurants, and raging parties to fill the time together. You’re not going to turn into a homebody just yet, but an evening cuddled on the couch watching Saturday Night Live and old sitcom reruns sounds pretty good.
Adventures together will always be important, but you don’t need to do anything to be content together, just a little flirting. Extroverts, this may be the big way to know you’re in love since you usually crave social interaction.
7. YOU SEE HIM IN YOUR FUTURE
Pre-love, decisions could be all about you. But, you may know you’re in love when you start making decisions based on the two of you. It could be tiny things, like picking up extra fruit at the market because he’ll need snacks at your place. Or, it could be bigger things, like wondering if another 12-month lease on your apartment is a good idea or considering if you’d really take that job across the country if he couldn’t move with you.
Or maybe you’re just daydreaming about what your babies will look like. However it manifests itself, if you are in love, you may not be planning a solo journey anymore, but one where he is by your side.
8. YOU CAN’T IMAGINE LIFE WITHOUT HIM
Your lives are so entangled that the idea of moving on without him sends your thoughts into chaos. Not only is he your constant companion, you also provide emotional support for each other.
This is more than a feeling that you don’t want to be without him, but that you really can’t. Of course, you could be just fine apart, but right now, from your blissed-out perspective it’s impossible to imagine what that would be like because he is such a part of your present and future.
9. YOU WANT TO TAKE CARE OF HIM
When he’s got that grouchy man-sickness, instead of hiding out you’re picking up electrolyte drinks and chicken soup, or even worse, whipping up homemade soup.
When he’s had an awful day at work, you are helping him brainstorm on what to do differently. When your happiness and wellbeing are tied together, and his hurts are painful for you too, you can be pretty sure you’re in love.
10. YOU TALK ABOUT HIM TO ANYONE WHO WILL LISTEN
By now you know everything about him, from the way he way his eyes crinkle when he laughs to the way he takes his coffee, and so do all your friends because you can’t stop talking about him. Your constant barrage of words stems from a desire to brag about him and from wanting everyone to love him as much as you do.
Since he’s always in your thoughts, it’s natural that he is always in your words. Plus, you just want to shout out your feelings. Since couch-jumping antics while telling a televised audience about your love is rarely appropriate, talking about him nonstop will have to do.
11. HE MAKES YOU WANT TO BE A BETTER PERSON
Suddenly you find yourself working harder, tidying up more often, being friendly to strangers and trying to be on time. Everyone has their own imperfections, but love often inspires you to work on them. Whether it’s a desire to impress him or a way to prepare for your future together, you’ll know you’re in love when he makes you want to be a better person.
12. HE GETS YOUR COMPLETE ATTENTION
Most days your attention flicks between email, Facebook, whatever is on T.V. and your incoming text messages. But, if you are in love, you may only have eyes for him whenever he is around. From putting your phone on silent to shutting the schedule and concerns out of your mind, you don’t waste your time on distractions, when you could be focused on him.
13. YOU THINK HIS RIDICULOUS STORIES ARE HILARIOUS
No one else in the room is laughing except you, but you think that story from his high school days is the funniest thing you’ve heard in ages. In fact, you find it funnier now that you did the first three times you heard it. Not only do you hang on every word he says, you also see the very best in him, which makes every joke laughable and every tale interesting, even if you are the only one to think so.
14.YOU WANT TO FORGIVE
Holding grudges and staying mad is for flings, crushes and love-hate relationships. You’ll know that you’re completely in love when you want to work out difference before they grow into problems.
When arguments do arise, you’ll probably want to sort them out, forgive and move forward as soon as possible. Being upset with someone you love can be excruciating, but forgiving, within reason, can feel freeing,
15. YOU CAN’T WAIT TO GET HIM INTO BED
Great sex is part of most happy relationships. But, when you are in love it may take on even greater significance. Love may allow you to open yourself up more to your partner, let go of all your insecurities and become more adventurous. The result may be the hottest sex you have ever had.
Besides feeling good, sex can be an excellent way to express your emotions. When you are falling head over heals, you may want to grab him and take him at every chance just to release everything you are feeling.
As wonderful as falling in love is, it can also be a bit scary and confusing. Happily, there are plenty of signs to tell you you’re in love. While noticing a single sign may not mean much, if evidence starts to pile up, take notice. If you recognize yourself in three, four or even ten of these signs you may have taken the plunge into real love.