There’s just something about kissing, whether it’s a first kiss that takes your breath away and makes your foot pop or it’s the kiss you share with your husband on your wedding day. Kissing is wonderful, and it’s also something that both men and women worry about doing right. Fortunately, there are quite a few things you can do to be a great kisser!
Make no mistake, kissing is important. More than half of all men and two thirds of women have ended a relationship because their partner was a bad kisser. But you don’t have to worry about that! The following advice will help you be a better kisser, brush up on skills that may be dusty from disuse or simply wow your man with some new kissing moves!
1. Have Kissable Lips
A plumping lip gloss will have your lips looking extra kissable. Most lipsticks that achieve this effect do so with cinnamon, mint or another natural ingredient. Make sure to try it out ahead of time, just in case your lips react poorly to the gloss. The same thing can happen with heating or cooling lubes. Read more about that.
Lip gloss makes your lips look shiny, and lipstick adds a touch of color that will attract your man’s attention right to your mouth. But some men actually prefer kissing lips that are naturally soft. Make sure you’re moisturizing with a quality balm like that from Burt’s Bees, and pay attention during dry winter months, when your kissing pout might need an extra dollop of moisture. Consider a lightly tinted balm so your lips will look luscious without feeling sticky.
Men also go wild when a woman chews on her lower lip. It definitely gets him thinking about kissing you! Try it when you lock eyes with a handsome stranger across a crowded room.
2. Beat Bad Breath
Preparation doesn’t just stop at how your lips look and feel, however. The smell is important. Although you can use something on your lips with a wonderful scent and flavor, this won’t fully cover up bad breath – and smelling good is important if you want to make him kiss you!
Bad breath can be quite normal, especially when you wake up in the morning. But proper oral hygiene, including brushing and flossing daily, can go quite a ways in killing those bad breath germs. Don’t forget that drinking enough water also helps to combat bad breath. A piece of gum, breath mint or strip can also help if you don’t have time to run to the bathroom. Breath sprays fit easily into your bag when you’re on a date.
3. Let Him Know You Want to Kiss
If you’ve ever been in a situation where you gazed into a man’s eyes, especially if it’s before your first kiss, and you knew that kiss was coming, you were probably thrilled with the tension hanging in the air between you. It’s like being in your own personal Hollywood movie, and you’re the leading woman. Whether it’s your first kiss or your fiftieth, you need to let him know.
Making eye contact is definitely a good way to do it. In the show FRIENDS, Rachel explains to Joey in one episode how she lets a guy know she wants to kiss him at the end of the date by leaning into him so they’re almost close enough to kiss. She then makes a soft and satisfied moaning sound, which always gets her the kiss she desires!
Many men will find it hot if you make the first move. Grasp his chin with your hand and draw his face toward you while you plant one on him!
4. Use Tongue
Of course, many people consider using tongue to be the main event of kissing, and some people don’t even like closed-mouth kissing with their partners. If you’re worried about how to be a good kisser, then you need to know what to do with your tongue. You don’t want to aggressively invade your partner’s mouth, nor do you want your tongue to lay there lifelessly.
Start by gently licking his lips, then push them open with your tongue. Don’t plaster your tongue against his teeth; although, lightly running along the edge of his front teeth might feel good. When your tongue reaches his, you can gently rub yours against it or swirl yours around it. Lightly sucking on his tongue can also be a good technique.
Although your tongue shouldn’t be glued to the roof of his mouth if you want to be a good kisser, you can lightly tickle the top of his mouth every once in a while.
Once you’re into a hot and heavy makeout session, you may want to go for more. There’s nothing wrong with sex, even on your first date, but sometimes it’s enough to stop at kissing. When you leave him more, it can definitely build sexual chemistry and have him coming back for more which is exactly like what a bad girl would do!
5. Vary Your Technique
Just because you’ve made it to the French kissing stage – more on that in this post – doesn’t mean you always have to shove your tongue down his throat. Instead, pepper in some closed-mouth kisses. Kiss the side of his mouth or his cheek. Ears also love to be kissed. Gently take his lobe in your mouth before you pull away.
If you’re kissing as part of foreplay, you can leave a hickey as long as he doesn’t mind (then you’ll want to get rid of a hickey fast!). Try lightly breathing warm across his skin before you kiss. Or, purse your lips to blow a cool stream of air against him before you plants your lips.
Gently suck on his lower lip, especially as you’re pulling away. Try a gentle bite of his lower lip, then move to the top to nibble. If your man likes it rough, you can try a harder bite, but be careful not to hurt him! Try out kisses and biting on other parts of his body.
You can always mimic what he’s doing. Chances are, he’ll like it done to him if he’s doing it to you!
6. Include the Rest of Your Bodies
If you want to be a good kisser, you might focus all your energy on what you do with your lips, tongue and mouth. However, this could be a mistake. Your body shouldn’t just stand there lifelessly. In fact, you can go from a good kisser to a great kisser just by using the rest of your body. Here’s how.
- Wrap your arms around him. It could be around his waist or around his neck, so your hands are interlocked. You can keep one hand at his side and the other lightly wrapped around his neck.
- Reach up and run your fingers through his hair. Gently tug if his hair is long enough to do so.
- Press your chest or hips closer to him, especially if you hope to get further than kissing later in the evening.
- If you’re sitting, you can lean against him or drape your leg over his.
- Scratch your nails down his arms or back.
- Pull him closer to you by grasping his shirt.
- Reach around and gently squeeze his ass while you kiss.
- Run your hands over his pants. You might discover he’s hard and ready to move to the next level!
- Slide your hands up his shirt. Feel his stomach and chest. Consider playing with his nipples.
If you want a little more information, check out this video with more kissing techniques and tips!
7. Avoid Awkwardness
When you’re kissing someone, you can occasionally bump heads, go in from the wrong angle or bite one another. These things happens all the time, and you should laugh them off rather than worry about how to be a good kisser when they happen. If you let him lean in first, you’ll see the direction he’s going. Then, you can go in from the other way to avoid colliding your noses together!
It’s also important that you breathe during your nose while kissing if you want to be a great kisser. Otherwise, you’ll just wind up gasping for air, which isn’t so sexy. However, you could occasionally inhale lightly through your mouth while kissing your man. This can feel quiet intimate, and the exchange of energy is similar to Tantric sex.
One thing you need to understand if you want to know how to be a great kisser is how to place your mouth. If it’s open too wide, the kiss will feel sloppy and will likely result in uncomfortable wetness. You may need to adjust the angle of your jaw if your partner has a smaller mouth than you do. Your lips should be relaxed so your man can enjoy how soft they are, but there’s a delicate balance between soft lips and loose lips.
Finally, you don’t always have to keep your head locked into place. That’ll only lead to a sore neck! You can move side to side, up and down or away and closer again a bit. Moving away gives you time to catch your breath, even though your faces might remain close together.
8. Get Out of Your Head
The last tidbit of advice that will help you be a great kisser is simply not to overthink it. Like anything sexual, an emotional connection or sexual chemistry does a lot, even if your technique is lacking or you and your man like to kiss differently! Let your body do the talking, and don’t worry about any of those silly noises that can happen or if you accidentally moan. Your man might even find that hot!
For many people, it only makes sense to close their eyes while they kiss, and you should do this if you want to be a good kisser and it helps you enjoy the moment. This also means you shouldn’t necessarily plan the moment. Sorry! But an unexpected kiss can be quite thrilling!
There’s no single secret about how to be a great kisser, but you can get pretty close with the advice above. This post can also help you along your journey. And remember, make sure you’re having fun too!