A few exceptions to this rule, however, might be valid. One is if a man has what's medically known as a micropenis, a rare condition Health has explored before. The other is if a guy's penis is really, really big.
The latter is something that can be intimidating to many women, who worry about whether an XXL member will fit, if it'll feel good, and if sex can still be pleasurable. And while the answers to the three questions above are yes (think about it, a baby comes out of there), yes, and hell yeah, there are a few things to know before you hit the sheets with a well-endowed dude. Read on for an ob-gyn's advice on making the action super enjoyable.
Start with lots of foreplay
Sure you might be in the mood and feel ready to hit the bedroom for the main event. But if your vagina is not fully aroused, penetration can feel a little rough and lead to soreness. That may result in tiny tears at the entrance to the vagina that definitely won't feel good and can even be a conduit for infection.
During arousal, the vagina naturally elongates and becomes more flexible, enough to accommodate pretty much any size penis. So let those changes happen with lots of kissing, touching, and oral sex moves that will prime you for intercourse. ”You will be much better able to deal with a larger penis if you're very well stimulated,” Jennifer Landa, MD, an ob-gyn and chief medical officer at BodyLogicMD in Orlando, Florida, tells Health.
Keep a lubricant at your bedside
Even if you have no problem getting wet during arousal, it can't hurt to supplement your natural moisture with the store-bought stuff. “Lubrication obviously helps to decrease friction,” says Dr. Landa. She recommends looking into a lubricant that is hypoallergenic and natural or with as few artificial ingredients as possible. Make sure it's not petroleum-based, which can degrade the latex in your partner's condom and potentially put you at risk of infection or pregnancy.
“One of my favorite natural lubricants is extra virgin coconut oil. It is moisturizing and lubricating and doesn't ball up like a lot of lubes you can buy,” she says.
Make sure his condom fits
“One of the main things to think of with a larger penis and condoms is the fact that not all condoms will fit him well," says Dr. Landa. "You certainly don't want to make his penis feel ‘choked’ and you also want to make sure the condom works well." Since it's his penis, he should know what brand and size fits him properly so it doesn't tear or feel too tight. But it can't hurt to keep a stash of XL size condoms on hand that he can choose from, so you know for sure you're both protected.
Stick to positions that put you in charge
“The positions that work the best are the ones where the woman can be on top and control the action," says Dr. Landa. "Woman on top facing towards her man seems to be one of the best because she can control how much or how little of his penis she is ready to take inside." Reverse cowgirl can work, too.
Beyond woman on top, experiment with missionary and side-by-side sex. “For missionary, you can try putting both of your legs inside of his. This will provide clitoral stimulation and prevent him from going too deep,” she says. Side by side, or spooning, also prevents his penis from going too deep, she adds.
Go with this doggy style variation
No disrespect to doggy style, but of all the main sex positions, this is the one that offers the deepest penetration. That can be a little too much for some women whose partners are very well-endowed, explains Dr. Landa.
Traditional doggy style, when a woman's hips are raised on a pillow and her legs are spread far apart, lets a guy go especially deep, she says, and it puts him in control of the depth and pacing. “If you want to do doggy style, it's important to close your legs together pretty well to prevent him from going as deep as he might otherwise,” she suggests. Or ask him to stay still and let you use your hips to direct the action