Work is a place where many people meet before entering into a relationship. Before you can get into any relationship, however, you need to determine if a coworker likes you or if he’s just friendly. Learn how to tell if a coworker likes you with this advice!
HOW TO TELL IF A COWORKER LIKES YOU
Most of the signs that a coworker likes you are similar to signs that any guy likes you. But you might spend more time in proximity with this coworker because of your job (or not if it’s a large workplace).
- PAY ATTENTION TO BODY LANGUAGE
It’s easy to tell if a coworker likes you, look for eye contact. There are two ways that people use their eyes when they like someone. One is that they make frequent eye contact. After all, they enjoy looking at you!
But if a coworker quickly averts his gaze when you look up, it’s another sign that he is into you. Sometimes we don’t realize that we’re staring, only to realize this when the object of your gaze makes eye contact with you. It’s in our nature to quickly avert our gaze and pretend that we weren’t staring in the first place, but few of us are excellent at hiding that fact!
Staring is an especially common tactic for people who are shy. They may not be bold enough to flirt or ask you out. Don’t give up hope on a shy guy before reading this post. Mirroring body language is another way that you can read a person’s feelings for you. Mirroring means he’ll adopt similar body language and poses as you, and he probably doesn’t even realize he’s doing it. So pay attention to your coworker’s body language if you want to know if he likes you.
Touching is another sign that a coworker likes you. Of course, we don’t mean full-on PDA, and we would hope that he’s not doing it at work! But touching your shoulder or arm, contact with the small of your back as you pass through or a door or guiding you into a meeting are all small touches that indicate that a coworker likes you. If you don’t return those feelings, this can feel pushy, awkward and even count as sexual harassment, but it might send tingles down your spine if you’re interested back.
- LOOK WHERE HE SPENDS HIS TIME
If a coworker likes you, he’s going to make time to speak with you. He might spend more time in or around your department, speak with you at break or lunch time or show up early or stay late just to get a chance to speak with you – or even to look at you!
When a coworker asks you for little favors, he’s not only making excuses to see and talk to you. Asking favors actually ingratiates a person to you, whether or not that’s the intent. So if a coworker asks for your help, especially when it’s obvious that he doesn’t really need it or that you won’t be of any assistance that is a sign that he likes you. He just wants to talk to you but might not be sure how to start a conversation.
Do you think a coworker likes you but is having trouble striking up a conversation? Don’t wait for him first. You can start the conversation.
- HE’LL SHOW THAT HE’S THINKING OF YOU
Another sign that a coworker has feelings for you is that brings you small gifts. It might be something small like candy or a cup of coffee in the morning. Gifts may be silly, like a stapler for your desk. If the present that he gives you is something that you mentioned wanting or needing, you can be sure that he has been listening to you, and this is another good sign that he likes you!
How do you tell if a coworker likes you? Examine your physical interactions. Is he close and in your space? He probably wants to be near you.
A surefire sign that someone likes you at work or school is that he waits for you. He may wait for you to go to lunch or to attend a meeting. You might see him waiting in the lobby as you’re coming into or leaving work. These few minutes in the beginning and the end of the day give him more time to spend with you. Although, it may be difficult to differentiate between friendly and flirtatious because you might do the same for coworkers who are your friends, even women.
Perhaps the biggest way to tell if a coworker likes you is that he wants to see you outside of work. He might not ask you out on a date, but he’ll make an excuse to see you outside of the office, whether it’s a new restaurant or a work project. If you get the hint that he wants things to be romantic, you might take this opportunity to make a move or to let him know that it’s okay if he makes one.
Look for special behavior that’s dedicated only to you. For example, he might use a slightly different tone of voice around you, or he may have a bright smile that he only flashes to you. These things can make you feel like confidantes or conspirators. Be careful because friends often act similarly.
- BUT IT’S NOT ALWAYS NICE
Sometimes people aren’t friendly to the people that they have a crush on. Perhaps you can recall a boy from your childhood who was mean to you because he liked you. Sometimes grown men do the same. It might not be exactly mean; it may just be flirtation. Or he may be outwardly cold and aloof. If he has the authority, he may assign you extra work or even indicate that you’re not doing a good job, but it’s all about his feelings for you (which he probably can’t handle).
But if he’s complimentary, especially with a twinkle in his eye, he probably likes you. He may even be trying to flirt with you and hoping you’ll pick up the hint if you’re also interested.
- HE LIKES YOU – NOW WHAT?
Sometimes you might worry that a coworker likes you because you’re not into him. You might want to avoid leading him on or making things awkward because you don’t return his feelings. However, you need to remember that he might not like you. He may just be friendly, and sometimes friendliness can be mistaken for flirtation. It may be better not to address the issue head on to make sure you don’t lead him on, but sometimes it’s better not to make a big deal out of it.
Once you’ve ascertained that a coworker likes you, you need to decide what to do about it. It might be exciting if you like him back, but there are things you need to consider. For example, your workplace might have a policy against dating other employees. If this person is either your superior or subordinate, sexual or romantic relationships are especially likely to be frowned upon or against the rules.
Even when there aren’t any rules about dating or sleeping with people from work, you need to consider if you want to keep your relationships separate from the workplace. You may not want people to gossip about you, and you might have to worry what will happen if you break up. Your coworkers might continue to gossip (and he might even encourage this behavior or spread rumors about you) or choose sides like friends and family sometimes do after a divorce.
But if you’re confident that the two of you can be either romantically or sexually involved and deal with any fallout like adults and that it won’t violate any workplace rules, it might be worth seeing where an office romance goes if you like him back. Many relationships start in the workplace (It’s one of the best places to meet a guy), and you never know where it can lead!
You can test the waters with a little work-friendly flirtation. This might be banter or teasing back and forth. If you notice he has a particular style of flirting, then do it right back to him.
Now that you know how to tell if a coworker likes you, you can defuse a potential situation from escalating. Be careful not to mistake friendly cues for those signs that he likes you, however. And when you do deal with it, make sure to be tactful if he doesn’t really like you or if you don’t like him back.