You may think that making out is a completely intuitive act, and often it is. However the first few times you make out with a new person can be nothing short of awkward if you don’t happen to have a lot of experience.
And asking someone for advice on how to make out, even a close friend, can result in embarrassment or receiving some terrible advice. So with all this in mind, here are a few make out tips to help ease you into your first time, or to improve your kissing skills.
1. A LITTLE BIT OF PREPARATION GOES A LONG WAY
Go into your date with soft lips and fresh breath, even if you aren’t sure you are going to be making out.
A tip for soft lips and fresh breath is to make sure you are hydrated and have washed your teeth. You can also place a little sugar and coconut oil on your lips to exfoliate using your toothbrush. Using lip balm is not an imperative…but if you do find yourself with chapped lips, then it’s a good idea to have some in your handbag to reach for.
2. LEAD UP TO MAKING OUT SMOOTHLY
Make eye contact, touch his hand and subtly lick or bite your lips while talking to him. These are all subtle ways to make him want to kiss you, without him realizing you are doing it. Keep in mind that being subtle is key to flirting and leading up to the kissing and making out with him.
Quick Note: Eye contact can go from intimate and sexy to creepy pretty fast if you don’t break eye contact after a few seconds.
These are all important things that take a while to master when learning how to make out with a guy, but once you do master them, you’ll notice that your make out sessions happen much more smoothly.
3. BE GENTLE
Lips are tender and sensitive, this is why kissing is so sensual after all! So starting softly is crucial when you first start figuring out how to make out.
So start my gently massaging his lips between yours using incredibly soft, slow kiss. You can then intensify your kissing by running your hands down his arms, wrapping your arms around him and pulling him in closer to you.
4. CLOSE YOUR EYES
This does not mean close them tightly, but just gently allow your eyes to fall shut as your lips touch and you start making out. If you occasionally open them that is okay, in fact occasional eye contact as you draw away from each other between kisses can be really sexy.
But do not keep your eyes open and staring the whole time while making out. After all, you don’t want to come across like the “over attached girlfriend” meme.
5. CHANGE THINGS UP
One warning that I want to give you as you learn how to make out with your guy is this:
Do not do the same motion over and over with your tongue and lips.
Instead, follow your intuition, and change things up. Follow his lead occasionally, and then take the lead yourself. Little subtle changes go a long way if you are in a long term relationship as well. Try things like:
- Switching which side you tilt you head.
- Kiss his bottom lip instead of his top lip, and vice-versa.
- Lick his lips instead of kissing them.
Changing things up is something I talk about in this guide on foreplay, that will also show you some great ways to get even more intense with your man
6. USE YOUR HANDS
There may be a second or two where you are not sure what exactly to do with your hands. Do not panic 🙂
You can place one hand casually on his shoulder, run your fingers across his neck, run your hands through his hair, or just wrap them around his back/waist. The great thing is that it’s easy to find a place for your fingers on your man that’s highly erotic while still not crossing any lines of decency…but there are also a ton of more erogenous places you can grab hold of too.
Most guys find their necks, just below the ears, as well as their cheeks to be very sensitive. Remember you do not have to go totally crazy to drive him wild with your kissing.
7. DO NOT USE TOO MUCH TONGUE
One vital thing to NEVER do as you learn how to make out with your man is to NEVER shove your tongue deep into his mouth…but do not be afraid to use a little tongue either. It’s a balance that you can only learn through experience.
Think of it like a dance, not a wrestling match. Run your tongue softly across his lips and use it to softly massage and play with his tongue. A great way to learn how much tongue is pleasurable is to pay attention to how much he uses. You’ll find certain techniques he uses with his tongue to be ‘too much’ while others are highly pleasurable.
8. CHAT IT UP
Another important aspect of learning how to make out and enjoy it is giving your partner feedback. You do not have to be completely silent, tell him if you like something he does.
Even a breathless “wow” is okay. But you can also be more specific too, telling him what you enjoyed, “I get so turned on when you bite my bottom lip” or “I love feeling your tongue massage my lips”.
9. HAVE CONFIDENCE
If you are in the middle of making out with your guy, clearly he finds you attractive. Pretty obvious, right?
So there’s no point in worrying about how you look in the moment. Enjoy being you and know -KNOW- that he is into you. Do not get hung up on any perceived flaws you think you have. Your man probably does not even notice whatever flaw you think you have. Additionally Every second you spend comparing yourself to someone else, or wondering if he cares about your flaws is a second wasted enjoying his company.
10. ENJOY IT
One of the first things you should know as you learn how to make out with your man is that it should always be fun. If you are not enjoying it, take the time to figure out why. For the sake of yourself and your man, you should be having fun and enjoying yourself. And besides, it will make it much more enjoyable for him if you are actually into it.
If you aren’t… maybe you are not with the right guy. Sometimes that first long kiss reveals that the passion and sexual compatability is just not there. Give him a chance to prove himself, but if you are not into it do not force yourself to do anything with your body that you do not enjoy.
11. REMEMBER, EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT
There is no paint by numbers formula for a successful make out session. I wish I could give you that one, expert make out tip that works perfectly every time, but sadly it just doesn’t exist.
What makes some hot, will leave another cold.
So try be in the moment, be yourself and take cues from your partner. There will be times that it is sweet, times when it is thrilling and times when it’s just so-so. So try to enjoy each moment, follow his lead and let him follow yours.
12. LEAVE HIM WANTING MORE
Do not keep going until you both have chapped, raw lips. It is normal to be aroused by making out, in fact it can be argued that it is the whole point. But, it is okay to leave him hanging, do not let him or anyone guilt you into going further just because of how aroused they are. It is perfect fine (and sometimes preferable) to leave him wanting more and it is okay to for you to be aroused at the end of a date without it going any further.
13. LAST MAKE OUT TIP: DO NOT BE THAT COUPLE
Location matters when it comes to the intensity and duration of your making out. You do not want to make everyone around you uncomfortable by making out heavily with your boyfriend every single time you are together. A kiss that lasts a few seconds is okay in a group of friends. A French kiss that lasts a few minutes can become uncomfortable.
Becoming a good kisser is easy if you follow the previous make out tips. The key is to be receptive to your partners’ desires, have clean teeth and fresh breath, and put effort in to do your part.