Your first job is to determine the reason you want to meet a man before you think about where to meet men.
For example, if you want a long-term relationship, a nightclub might not be your best bet for where to meet men. Nightclubs might be great places to meet men if you want only a fling. But they’re not the best places to meet men to have a relationship with. A church, temple or other religious organization might be a great place for meeting someone who shares your core values and beliefs, but if all you want is a fling, this is probably not the venue to choose. So please keep this in mind as you are reading down through the list.
Here’s a list of places to meet men.
1. THROUGH FRIENDS
The traditional way of meeting a guy was to be introduced to him through a mutual friend. And sometimes, the old-fashioned ways are the best ways. Research from Cornell University and the University of Indianapolis show that couples who meet through friends or family have stronger ties. Meeting this way is still one of the most socially acceptable ways to meet men.
Friends and family provide backing — they have already vouched for the guy’s character and have determined that the two of you might be a good match. And having mutual friends means that you can go out as group, which gives you additional support.
The disadvantage to this type of meet-up happens when it just doesn’t work out or if you are a private person. Now someone else is involved in the relationship, and you need to explain what happened. That might be awkward.
Meeting through friends has combined with the Internet, too, through apps like Hinge, that pairs you with your friends’ friends through Facebook. Hinge shows you possible matches, and you indicate whether you’re interested.
2. BAR/LOUNGE/NIGHTCLUB
Meeting men at a bar, lounge or nightclub is a no-brainer, making this a common place to meet men. That’s one of the main reasons these places exist. You probably wear something that you know you look hot in (what Beyonce calls a freakum dress); are on a mission to meet a guy; and you down a couple of drinks, which makes it easier to find something to say to a total stranger. Plus — it’s fun.
When you and a guy spot each other, if you like him, you stay with him. If not, you make an excuse, such as needing to get back with your friends. Easy peasy.
If you stay with him, you might have found a great one-night-stand, a fuck buddy or even a guy that you can start dating. Who knows?
If you’ve had a little too much to drink, however, your judgment might have been way off, and you realize the guy you thought was the one is not even close once you sober up.
And you are taking a risk in going home with someone you just met. He could be married, have an STD, or just be a creep. You also might find that the two of you have nothing in common except that you like to do shots.
But when it works out, you can head back to the bar for a future date.
3. SPORT ACTIVITY
Men who love sports also love it when they find out that women are into them, too, even if you’re not all that good. And that makes joining a sporting activity, when you are wondering where to meet men, a great way to meet a man. Pick a sport you’re already into or an activity you want to get more involved with. Here’s some ideas:
- A cycling group
- A hiking club
- A tennis league
- A ski club
- A running group
- A bowling league
Bring a friend with you so you won’t feel as awkward. A friend should make you feel more relaxed and give you the support you need.
What’s great about doing a sporting activity is that there is no pressure to meet someone, but the opportunity is there. The downside is that you might not meet anyone, but at least the exercise will do you good, which is another reason to choose a sport you enjoy.
4. RELIGIOUS GROUP
People have been meeting their life partner at church or temple long before online dating took hold, making this a preferred place to meet men for many women. It has traditionally been a good place for singles to meet. Many churches and temples organize activities for singles. If your goal is to eventually marry and have children, meeting a person at church ensures that you share the same religious beliefs.
When you become active in your church or temple, you meet all sorts of people, not just singles. Couples you meet who know you are looking, might know someone and can introduce you.
5. AT WORK
If you spend a lot of time at work, chances are good that you’ll meet someone there. But there are some do’s and don’ts of workplace romances, of which you should be aware:
- Don’t break your company policy. If your company has a policy that forbids workplace dating, don’t date anyone at work if you like your job and want to keep it.
- Do discuss with your potential guy what the two of you will do if you break up. When you still have to see each at work, it could be awkward and painful if you break up.
- Don’t indulge in PDA at the office. No one wants to see that. People will only resent you or think you aren’t doing your job well with the distraction, and neither bode well at work.
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Do remain professional. This includes refraining from posting about your relationship on social media. Try to remain as private as possible when dating a co-worker.
6. THE INTERNET
Hundreds of millions of people use online dating apps and websites. And many people marry after meeting someone this way.
The problem is that there is a multitude of online dating sites out there, and it can be overwhelming to know where to begin. My advice is to Google, “top dating apps” or “top dating websites” to find lists of the best apps and sites. Over time the “best” apps or sites can change, so make sure to check the date the article was written when reading it.
One thing people don’t like about these sites is the amount of information you need to give them. Be prepared to fill out a questionnaire and fill out a profile for most sites.
People also report mixed results with online dating, from excellent to frustrating — just like dating in general. You can definitely meet more potential partners online, but it can become confusing and overwhelming with so many choices.
7. THE GYM OR A FITNESS CLASS
The gym often pops to women’s minds when they are wondering where to meet men. It can be tough to meet a guy at the gym, however, because you don’t typically look your best there. And if you go all made up with your hair blown out perfectly, that doesn’t look right either.
A good compromise is to wear flattering gym clothes, put your hair up or in a ponytail and wear only a bit of mascara and lip gloss if you need to wear some makeup. And ditch the headphones. You need to be approachable when you choose a place like this to meet men.
Many guys you’d want to meet at the gym are lifting weights, so if you want to be noticed, it’s better to be in that area and start strength training.
If you see a guy you like on a machine, go over there and ask if you can “work in.” This common gym phrase means that you want to share the piece of equipment he’s using. Many people view this as a line people use when hitting on someone, so that can work for or against you, depending on whether the guy is feeling it.
Signing up for a regular fitness class is another place to meet men. If he’s a regular, it should be easy to strike up a conversation that begins with what you think of the class that can then lead to a date.
8. HOUSE PARTY
A house party is a good way to meet men because you’re going somewhere just for the purpose of having a good time. Although this is probably not the place to wear your freakum dress, you can still wear something you like and look good in but that’s also comfortable. You want to put out the vibe that you’re having fun.
When you find a guy you like talking with, don’t expect to spend all night with him. It’s a good idea to let him know that you enjoy his company but that you should mingle some. Maybe the two of you will rotate back to one another one or two times, at which point, the two of you can exchange contact info.
9. COLLEGE
Although there is a negative connotation when a woman meets a man at college (people saying you went just to get an “MRS” degree), it’s still a great place to meet men. You can meet a man and get your college degree, too, after all. You’re surrounded by men your age who applied and got into the same college as you. You have plenty in common right there.
Here’s where to meet men at college:
- In class
- Dorm activities
- College parties
- Study groups
- Clubs
- Campus job
- Games
- Local concerts
- Shopping around your college town
- Local coffee shop in town
- Studying in the library
- From your friends’ friends
10. VACATION
If you want to meet a guy on vacation, consider taking a solo vacation. There’s plenty of activity or adventure vacations to sign up for, such as horseback riding in Arizona, hiking in Yosemite, snorkeling or scuba diving in the Caribbean, just to name a few. Sometimes these activities are part of a singles package.
There’s also the all-inclusive singles resorts. As long as you stay on the property, everything is paid for — food, drinks and entertainment. Singles can mingle, often with an on-site singles coordinator, who sometimes acts as matchmaker.
Another idea is to stay at a bed-and-breakfast that offers activities, such as wine tasting. It’s natural to socialize at a B&B as opposed to a big hotel.
11. WEDDINGS
When you’re at a wedding, love is in the air. Committed relationships are on everyone’s mind, reminding both men and women how wonderful it is to find the love of your life.
Plan to go alone and, after you get the invitation, ask the person who invited you if you can sit at the singles table. If you really want to bring someone, make sure you make it clear to everyone around you that this person is just a friend.
12. THE DOG PARK
When you’re out with your best pal and you meet another dog owner, you already share something in common: your love of dogs. The conversation that comes is natural as you discuss dog breeds, how long you’ve had the dog, the dogs’ names, etc.
The Cesar Millan website reports on interesting survey results. If you want to attract a guy, the top dog breeds for doing that are German shepherds, golden retrievers, Labrador retrievers, huskies and French bulldogs. But you can’t go wrong with a rescue dog, either. Every dog lover respects people who rescue a dog.
Choosing the right place to meet a guy is vital. It allows you to prescreen for certain qualities, such as whether the guy is a party animal, whether he values his health or whether he’s religious. Whichever place or places you choose to meet men, the process is easier and more natural if you choose places you already have an interest in. That way, you and your potential new date already know you share certain interests.